My mom and I arrived in Scottsdale Sunday afternoon. I'm glad I picked the winter for this surgery -- the weather was beautiful, nothing like the 107-degree heat I experienced on my last visit down here.

Dr. Meltzer's driver, Robin, was waiting next to baggage claim carrying a sign with my name on it. We collected our baggage and loaded ourselves up in the car. Robin had another of Dr. Meltzer's patients to pick up, so we swung around to another terminal. Usually, she prefers to give people individual rides, but occasionally there's an overlap that can't be avoided.

We picked up a very nice Spanish woman who hopped in the back with my mom and the two of them hit it off right away. She came here for the same surgery as I'm having, plus quite a bit of facial surgery. She's having her facial surgery on the day before I'm going under, and the rest on the day after me.

We were dropped off at our hotel and checked in. I found a hotel just a block away from the surgery center. It's got a little kitchen in it, so we'll be able to make simple meals there to keep costs down. We were put into a smoking room at first. It stunk, so I went down to the office to complain. Apparently there was a convention in town so all the non-smoking rooms were taken. I got to practice being a bit assertive as the room was completely unacceptable. Luckily someone had just checked out of a double non-smoking room so we were able to move into that one. It turned out to be a huge improvement -- not only did it not have that ever-present stale smoke stink, but it was on the second floor at the end of the hall. This meant that we could leave the windows open all the time and not have anyone peering in on us. We got a good bit of sun and the whole energy of the room was substantially better.

We still talked about finding a new hotel to stay at once I am released from the hospital. While it's a great room for two people, my sister will be coming down to stay on Saturday, and she'll be bringing a lot of schoolwork with her. Things can get very tight for the three of us. I'll also have to dilate four times a day for the first month after surgery -- something I'll demand privacy for. It's something that I'll have to do in bed, so both my mom and sister will have to leave for about half an hour four times a day. We started looking at other nearby hotels online and decided to check one of them out tomorrow. It's further away, but once I'm out of the hospital, there's really no need to be close by.

We then set out for dinner. I knew downtown Scottsdale, Old Town, was one way down the main road but we set out in the other direction in search of a grocery store. I never expected it to be such a challenge to find a place to eat, but it took a lot of time before we got to finally eat. It was a combination of not being willing to eat fast food and it being 4pm on a Sunday the limited our options. Had we been a couple hours earlier or later many more things would have been open, but we ended up finding a Chinese place to have our dinner. It really wasn't very good, but we were starving. Sadly, on our way home we saw that a number of the places we saw that were closed were now open. Oh well.

Robin came to the hotel to pick us up in the morning. I had a 9am pre-op appointment with Dr. Meltzer that day. Already in the car was a young Canadian woman who'd had her surgery this summer. She was experiencing quite a bit of pain from a complication that had recently started acting up.

I was called into one of Dr. Meltzer's examination rooms where I spoke with one of his nurses. There was a good bit of paperwork to fill out. I think that a good half of it was because I had elected to have silicone breast implants, not saline. There are a number of requirements, including mandatory participation in a study of the long-term effects of such breast implants.

There was a bag waiting for me in the exam room with my name on it. Inside were various medical pills and items, a very nice bathrobe and a comfy-looking neck pillow. Also a bundle of what I correctly guessed were my dilators. I'll become very familiar with those soon....

Dr. Meltzer came in and examined me. He measured the circumference of my nipples and determined that they were too small to allow the breast implants to be inserted through them. I would need an incision on the bottom fold of my breast, he said it'd be about 4.5 cm long, and be very hard to find after a year. He'd be relocating my fold down to a place on my chest more natural-looking. When I started talking about size he told me he doesn't determine the size until he's got me on the operating table. He inserts sizers and determines what size and shape breasts would give me the most natural appearance. He thought about 400cc, maybe as much as 500. He'd be aiming for a full C cup. I like this approach, as the same size breasts can look very different from chest to chest.

Dr. Meltzer answered all of my remaining questions and left. I began dressing when a knock on the door interrupted me. Dr. Meltzer had forgotten to let me to keep my clothes off until I had been photographed. I took off the few clothes I had managed to get on, put my robe back on and walked down the hall to the photo room. When I got there I realized the photos were just for my breasts and I could have left my panties on. So, here I was stark-naked and getting photographed... Well, I guess after several months of my electrolygist working on my genitals with her magnifying glasses on, I can handle anything now.

When I returned to the waiting room, I found my mom talking with the Spanish Woman from the day before. We chatted a bit until Robin came by to return us to the hotel. We'll have plenty of time to chat later while we're both recovering from our surgeries. Robin took us to a drive-through pharmacy on the way home so we could drop off our post-surgery prescriptions (plus one for tomorrow).

Mom and I spent the rest of the day exploring Scottsdale. There's quite a lot to do here, so I think my mom and sister will have a good time. We found a Borders for my mom to take her daily walk to and have her coffee. I think that was the most important accomplishment of the day. We walked across the whole downtown area, going what seemed like several miles, until we got to the hotel I had looked up online for our stay after I'm released from the hospital. Unfortunately there are two of these hotels in town, and this one only has studio suites (not much better than the one we're in now) and two-bedroom suites. The one-bedroom suites I'd seen online were only at the other branch, at the edge of town, far enough away to make it not worth the hassle. There are other options in town, but we decided to wait 'till my sister got here and see what she has to say. Maybe it won't be so bad squeezing the three of us in there.... We'll see.

The second major priority for the day was to find a nice place to have dinner. It would be the last real food I'd have for a few days, so I wanted to make sure we went somewhere good and fun. We settled on Ra, a trendy sushi place that also had a lot of Asian-style (but not sushi) appetizers and entrees for my mom. We ordered a nice bottle of sake and a few appetizers. I had sushi that wasn't very special -- I must be spoiled living in San Francisco -- and mom had a delicious teriyaki salmon on wasabi mashed potatoes. Even though the sushi wasn't up to my standards, we had a great time, and it was a very nice last meal.

Today wasn't a very fun day. I wasn't allowed to eat anything but clear liquids -- clear broth, sugar-free Jell-O and apple juice. I was given the treat of one bottle of Ensure with each meal. At least it had calories to give me energy. I also had to drink 8 ounces of water every hour that I was awake. I picked up a couple packs of 8.5 ounce water bottles to make it easy on myself. I lined them up, and by the end of the day had 13 bottles.

I also had to do my "bowel prep" that day. Oh fun! It started at 5:30 when I drank a whole bottle of some nasty liquid. I was expecting to be running for the bathroom within 15 minutes, but other than having to pee all the time, nothing happened. At 9 pm I had to insert a suppository and at 9:30 I had three pills to take. That did the trick, and I started evacuating everything I had in my stomach. It came in spurts... I was hoping to be through it all that night, but I woke up in the middle of the night to go, and I still had to go before leaving for the hospital in the morning the next day.

I took a long hot shower that night, knowing it'd be my last for a while, and also figuring it's something that would relax me. To be honest, I don't think I needed much relaxing... I had expected to be a wreck by this time, bouncing off the walls with anxiety -- but I was surprisingly calm. I had no trouble getting to sleep, and aside from having to get up in the middle of the night to take care of business I slept well.

I woke up after a surprisingly good sleep, got ready and waited outside with my mom for Robin to pick us up and take us to the Surgery Center. I registered and filled out some paperwork and sat in the waiting area with my mom for a few minutes before I was called back. My vitals were taken and I was given a bulky paper hospital gown and a couple bags for my clothes and shoes. I went to the bathroom one last time and met my nurse in a bay surrounded by curtains. It was cold. I climbed into the bed and was covered with a warm blanket -- it felt really good, but it was a bit too short for me, so they hooked me up to something that looked like a vacuum cleaner tube. It connected to my paper gown and when they turned it on it puffed up with warm air. Neat-O!

The nurse asked me a bunch of questions, and eventually my anesthesiologist came in to talk to me. I told him it was my first time having surgery and he said there was nothing to worry about. My mom came in and we talked for a bit. It was amazing how calm everyone was -- including my mother and I. Eventually Dr. Meltzer showed up and we briefly chatted before he went off to get ready. I was given a sedative shot and said my last words to my mom before I was wheeled off. I remember going down a few corridors and then it feels like I drifted off to sleep for a second, but woke up immediately in the recovery room. I slowly started to become aware of what was around me and noticed that nobody was at my bedside at first. Someone came by and told me everything went fine and I was going to be just fine. I was in and out of consciousness, but I recall picking up bits here and there that indicated I stayed under longer than expected after the surgery ended -- thus waking up alone. I guess I may be sensitive to the drugs, because I went out like a light before I expected to and stayed under longer too.

I drifted off to sleep again and woke up in my room on the overnight stay floor of the surgery center. I looked around -- it was a very nice room. Soothing colors, flat screen TV on the wall, three comfy chairs and a table in the window. I could see a mountain outside of the window too -- not the big Camelback Mountain, but the one right next to it. Once I got up, I could see that I had a very good view of Camelback too, just not from bed.

I was still pretty out of it, but I saw that on my right hand I had an IV taped down. On the index finger of that hand I had something with a red LED light taped to the tip and connected to some machine with a wire. I had no idea at the time what it was (O2 saturation monitor), but it sure looked cool with the lights out -- ET phone home! I had a blood pressure cuff on my right arm that automatically started up every 30 minutes or so. It was rather annoying, but it could've been every hour -- it felt like 5 minutes. My lower legs were wrapped in leggings that inflated at random intervals. Sometimes both at once, but usually just once side. The length of time they remained varied too. These are to prevent blood clots from forming in my legs and traveling up my body doing major damage. I had these on all during surgery because I spent the whole time in stirrups which forced my legs in odd angles. I also had a catheter and a couple drains coming from my crotch. At least I wouldn't have to get up to pee....

I felt dull pain from different parts of my body, but it was never that bad. My crotch had a dull ache. My breast was a bit more tender, and shot darts of pain into me whenever I tried to shift my body even a bit. Oddly, I think that first day the most discomfort came from my elbows. I was told it had something to do with the way I was positioned during surgery. It only bothered me that first day. I had a morphine drip attached to my IV and a button clipped to my gown that I could hit for an immediate fix if I felt discomfort. I think I only hit it a few times -- the regular schedule did quite well. I liked to hit it before I actually felt pain, when it was still in the discomfort stage.

I was in and out of sleep all night long. I don't think I slept for more than 45 minutes at a time. Time crept along so slowly, but every time I woke up I checked email on my iPhone. For the day of surgery, and the first day after -- this was my best friend. I used it to let everyone know I was ok, updated my status on myspace and facebook and fielded numerous emails. I loved being able to let my friends and family hear from me so quickly that I was OK.

My mom came in to morning of day 1 after getting some rest at her hotel just two blocks away. She had spent almost all day with me or waiting for me the day before. I don't even remember what time she left, but it was late and she was exhausted. I love you Mommy!

My blood pressure cuff came off last night, and in the morning I lost my morphine drip. I started getting oral pain killers from my nurses. A little later I lost my IV which meant I would be eating real food from now on. I had breakfast while still on the IV, but didn't have much of an appetite. They told me the O2 saturation sensor could be removed that night, but I was doing well enough that they took it off with the IV. It was a huge relief to be freed up so much. Now I only had my catheter and my ever-inflating leggings connected. I also had two drains, but they went to little suction bulbs tied to my waist.

Sometime in the morning Tasha, Dr. Meltzer's nurse, came by to talk to me and let me know how my surgery went. She assured me everything was fine. She took a peek at my surgery site, which in turn gave me my first glimpse too. I saw nothing but a cartoonishly swollen mons pubis (the fleshy part just above everything, but below the waist). I saw the catheter tube and the drain tubes come out from behind it, but there really was nothing to see. She then cut away the ACE bandage that had been tightly binding my breasts. She showed me how to "exercise" them by pushing them together, down and up-and-in. I was to do those three movements five times every day. It stung to shift the implants around, mostly at the incision point under my breasts, but also an area behind my nipples protested quite a bit too. I was surprised to find that they'd remain unbound from now on.

I'm really happy with how my breasts turned out. The first thing I noticed was that the nipples are very well-placed. They are centered and point forward, unlike several other trans post-augmentation pictures I've seen. I mentioned this to Tasha who said that Dr. Meltzer prides himself on nipple placement. The breasts themselves are definitely bigger, but not huge. They're very tight and perky now, but that will all loosen up with time (and exercises). I think they really suite my frame well -- and my mom approves too, so that's a good sign right there.

Dr. Meltzer doesn't really discuss size with his patients before a breast augmentation. He waits to make his decision until he's got you on his operating table and tries out several different sized with "sizers" -- whatever they are. He chooses whatever size looks most natural on each body type, and from what I've seen he does a great job. I think this is a very good approach, because I could've gone in and said I want a B, C or a D and it'd be hard to know what one of those would look like on me. You can see what they look like on other women, but I'm almost surely got a larger frame than they do and a much larger ribcage. Dr. Meltzer chose 500cc implants for me, on the high end of what he was thinking (400-500), but I'm very pleased with them. This should make me a full C. I'll be glad to see what they look like in a couple weeks when the implants settle down a bit.

Later in the day I got a passcode to allow my laptop access to the wireless network here. I was told that it was a slow network, but I think that was the city-of-Scottsdale-network, not the Hospital network which apparently was just set up very recently (like, within a few weeks, tops). This network was very fast and I had no problem streaming my TV (and TiVo) from home using my SlingBox. Yes, I'm a geek, but I get better cable than they do here, plus I can catch up on my recordings.

I've been flooded with emails and phone calls wishing me good luck. Everyone has been surprised at how good I sound given that I had just had major surgery the day before. I spent much of the day responding to emails and taking little cat naps. My mom was also loads of support. She brought me a stuffed teddy bear I named Åsa. I told her Åsa was a trannimal. She used to be an elk, but had a bilateral Elkectomy with a Bjornoplasty and is recovering along with me. Those must've been some strong drugs I was on...

Dr Meltzer did not come by today (the only day so far as of Day 6). I know he was working on our Spanish friend, and this evening she was moved into the room right next to mine, but was obviously too out of it for visitors. Poor girl had about eighteen hours of surgery over two days, and she had no one in town for support. I asked my mom to get a stuffed animal for her on her way home from the hospital tonight.

A new nurse woke me up today. The work on twelve-hour shifts here, and I typically have a nurse and a PCT (patient care technician) assigned to me. This was a male nurse who I instantly got a good vibe from. He's turned out to be my favorite RN, and I also had my favorite PCT today too. The whole nursing staff here is top-notch, but a few really stand out. My nurse told me that today would be an exciting day -- I would learn to cap off my catheter and be able to walk around today. As he was telling me this, my breakfast arrived which he sent over to the table by the window. He told me I'd be eating my breakfast over there today. I smiled.

Getting up to walk also meant finally getting rid of the compression leggings. I certainly won't be missing those. Capping the catheter is quite simple, actually. I pinch off the rubber hose on my side of a joint in the line, pull it apart and stick a plug in my end while capping off the other end which leads to the bag. It never feels like you're peeing when you're connected, but they kept emptying my bag -- liter after liter. I could easily pee two liters a day, usually more. Crazy.

The head of my bed was raised as much as possible, and my feet lowered. I swung my feet around to the floor and realized my chest hurt way too much to be able to push myself up. My nurse gave me his arm, which I hooked with my own and using muscles that didn't hurt my chest I got up. I slowly made my way the ten feet to my table and sat down on an inflatable donut ring. It didn't really hurt to sit down, but it was not at all comfortable. There was a pulling below, and my swollen front was really feeling the pressure. It didn't matter -- I was up and about! No longer confined to bed. While I ate my breakfast it was explained to me that I would begin my "bladder training." Bladder training means teaching your bladder to once again hold its contents for a couple hours, then release. Over and over again. It surprises me that something my bladder had been doing fine for over thirty years could be forgotten in a matter of days, but that's life.

After breakfast, I wanted to take a shower, but I had left my soap and shampoo at my hotel. I didn't think I'd need it so soon. I called my mom and asked her to bring it for me when she came over and decided to shower on my next round of being disconnected from my catheter. I walked around the room, and pretty much farted a lot. It sounds gross, but you have no idea how good that felt. It relieved so much pressure that had been building up and was causing a lot of discomfort. I was told to expect a bowel movement in the next couple days. To be honest, I was terrified of one, but I knew how much it'd hurt if I didn't.

A bit later, my mom showed up with my shampoo and soap. I disconnected and took my first shower. It was really slow as most movements I tried with my arms caused pain. I was allowed to only run water over the surgery sites, but it felt so good to finally be clean. My mom also had with her a stuffed panda bear for my neighbor. It was so cute! We went over to see how she was doing and gave her the bear. She seemed so happy to get it, she immediately give it a big hug and started thinking about a name for it. Debbie from Dr. Meltzer's office stopped by and told me that tomorrow I'd be able to walk outside, which was amazing so soon after surgery. She told me a number of good places to go, and gave me a lot of tips to deal with my recovery and the steps along the way.

All this walking around felt really good, but it also increased the pressure I was feeling in my crotch. I got back into bed and took some medicine and fell asleep for a bit. When I woke up, I felt very refreshed. The PCT came by with a bundle of flowers in a very pretty tea cup from my Family back home in Chicago. What a nice way to wake up!

Later that evening my mom picked up a pizza from Oregano's across the street. On a normal day, I would've said it was outstanding pizza, but after a couple days of no food, followed by bland hospital food it was like ambrosia. I ate far more of it than I should have, and I didn't feel guilty at all.

I was woken up in the middle of the night to have my drains emptied. Other than that, I slept through the whole night -- quite an improvement over the nights since surgery when I'd have trouble sleeping for more than an hour at a time.

I have the same nurse today as I had yesterday -- something I'm glad for. I really liked him, and I'm happy he's the one who's going to take out my drains. It kinda scares me, and he just seems very competent. Not like the others seem at all incompetent -- not at all -- but I just get a good vibe from him.

So, the drains came out one at a time. The first one was shallow, and didn't hurt much at all but the second one was much deeper and stung like crazy. I was offered some pain meds when it was over, which I accepted but the pain was gone by the time he returned from the medicine cabinet (or wherever they hide their candy). It's very nice to be free of the drains. Even though they didn't attach to anything, they were bulky and got in the way. I'd have to tuck the reservoirs into my panties when I got up to walk around and when I showered I had something rigged up with a long strip of medical tape around my neck and a drain safetypinned to either end. It was really annoying.

Sometime after lunch my PCT came in with yet another bouquet of flowers -- this one in a very pretty vase and a beautiful note from my best friend of 25 years and his family. I was so happy for them I cried, something that's very much out of character for me. I'm not on any hormones at all now but even when I started taking feminizing hormones I didn't cry more than three times -- and all for sad things. This time it actually felt good to cry.

My nurse explained to me that I was allowed to go outside on my own for up to three hours at a time. I had to sign a release, of course, but the lure of outside was only eclipsed by the thought of non-hospital food. I had fish tacos on my brain.

Weekends are really slow at the surgery center. Other than Dr. Meltzer's patients, most patients are just there for a night or two. Saturday seemed very quiet and slow, but Sunday was dead. I found out that there were only three patients on the floor today -- my neighbor, someone who had stayed longer than expected due to pain and myself. Dr. Meltzer was the only one from his office to stop by during the weekends. Nothing was scheduled for me, so he just stopped by to check in on me. There's really not much to say about today as I didn't do much other than walk around the floor several time to build my stamina.

Another slow day. My sister was gone the whole day to work on her paper, so I just had my mom to keep me company for most of the day. With the start of the work week, I again was visited by Dr. Meltzer's staff -- Tasha and Debbie. I took a bit of a walk today to the local office supply store in search of a keyboard. With my laptop on my tray table I have to bend my arms in such a way to type that my wrists quickly start to hurt. I found a cheap keyboard that helped my wrists a lot. Again, a slow day other than my single excursion.

After a slow couple of days, I was in for some big excitement today. The stitches holding my labia together were removed by Tasha. This meant that my packing would come out and I'd begin dilating -- something I'll do for the rest of my life.

Tasha came by in the morning and readied a suture removal kit. She pulled back the tape covering my incisions under my breasts and cut the tape in half, lengthwise so that the new top of the tape just covered the incision lines. She grabbed the piece of the suture that was sticking out on one end and gave a slow, steady pull on it. Apparently the whole incision was closed by one single thread, which Tasha had just now pulled out. There was a bit of discomfort, but it wasn't bad and didn't take long. She did the other side and then went down to my crotch.

The stitches holding my labia together were a bit more uncomfortable to remove. There were several stitches, from front to back, and each one removed was accompanied by a little pinch that didn't feel great. Tasha handed me a mirror and gave me an anatomy lesson -- nothing I didn't already know. She then slowly pulled the packing out. Yard after yard of bloody gauze came out of me. It was one of the oddest sensations I have ever felt, and it went on for quite some time. Now it was time to dilate.

Tasha lubed up the dilator (the #1, the smallest in diameter) and began inserting it. I had to relax for it to get past the PC muscle, but it went in pretty easy to a depth of nearly six inches. Now it was my turn to drive. I put it in and held it for about ten to fifteen minutes. She told me that today I'd have to dilate every four hours, even waking up in the middle of the night to do it. After today it'd only be four times a day (only!) three to five hours apart. After a month, I'd drop down to twice a day for a while, then once a day and eventually working my way to once a week within the first six months to a year.

For the next two weeks, I also have to rub antibiotic ointment on my incisions twice a day -- generally just after my first and last dilation of the day. My last dilation should also have some of the ointment on the dilator to get my insides covered too.

I found that dilating quickly became difficult for me. After my labia were freed up the swelling I had localized in the front spread between my legs and I had massive labia. With the packing removed my vaginal canal was also able to swell up, making dilation more difficult. The canal got tighter, and I found that I had lost about a quarter inch in depth. The last inch became very difficult to get, and I had to wait about five minutes after I insert the dilator before I can get to my full depth. This part is important, because if I don't dilate to my full depth, I'll lose it. For me, dilating has been a bloody and painful process. I find a pool of blood under me every time I dilate -- it leaks out of me and runs down to the bed. I've started dilating with a disposable pad underneath myself to spare the sheets. I wasn't expecting to like dilation, but I also didn't expect it to be this uncomfortable....

Waking up from a good, sound sleep in the middle of the night to dilate is one of the most unpleasant things ever. All I want to do is sleep, but instead I had to hurt myself and make blood ooze out of me. Not fun.

The upside is that with my labia freed up, I find myself much more comfortable -- when not dilating. Walking, sitting and going to the bathroom are all much less painful and I feel I have a lot more range of motion. Also, it seems like my arms are much more able to work and bear weight every day as my breasts loosen up and heal. When I first got out of surgery, I needed a couple nurses to scoot my body up in bed when I slid down. Now, I'm able to easily do it myself without much discomfort at all.

Today was to be a very good day -- my catheter was coming out! It was the last probe, wire, tube, whatever attached to me and I couldn't wait to be free of it. Tasha came by in the morning to deflate the anchoring balloon in my bladder and slowly pull it out. It was very unpleasant coming out, probably because it had been in for almost a week at this point. She told me I should relax for about ten minutes and then pee if I can. I should be able to, but if not the catheter can always be reinserted.

Well, I'd been saving up and by the time ten minutes had gone by I really needed to go! I went to my bathroom and sat down on the toilet. This was really strange -- everything had been rearranged so I didn't know what I was supposed to do or what it was supposed to feel like. I just relaxed and prepared myself for a big mess. I felt the pee travel down my urethra, further and further and then it just stopped. The pressure built up and I had to use my muscles to stop peeing and pull it back into my bladder. It was agony -- more pain than I had felt during this whole process. But, I knew I had to pee, so I tried again and again to the point I could take it no longer -- I was nearly in tears from the pain.

I took a walk down to the nurses' station and asked them for some tips on taking my first pee. They gave me a tranquilizer to relax me and told me to lay down for at least half an hour and then try again. Different positions work for different people. Some do best on the toilet, others do well standing in the shower. Some respond well to having warm water spritzed on their crotch.

Half an hour later I was trying all these things, only to face the same result. I called the nurse to discuss options. She *really* didn't want to put the catheter back in and suggested I relax a bit longer. If it got to the point I couldn't stand it anymore she's put it back in. It was hard to take at this point. I was able to stop after my first attempts and relax for some time, but this time I couldn't go ten minutes before I started squirming around in my bed, unable to stand it. I called the nurse and told her I couldn't take it anymore. It was a big defeat for me -- I so wanted to be rid of the catheter, but I had to go SOOOO bad...

She put a new catheter in me, and I could hardly feel it going in. I immediately began filling up the bag and within a couple minutes I had filled it to 1200cc. That's more than a liter! I was unhappy to have the catheter back in, but it was overshadowed by my relief. I lay in bed for quite a while after that, connected to the catheter. I had done enough bladder training for the day...

Tasha and Dr. Meltzer come by in the morning. I've been doing really well, other than not being able to pee so they decided I was fit to be discharged. I had already paid for the next night, so it was up to me if I wanted to stay or not (I'd be reimbursed if I left). I have to say I was tempted to stay. I really enjoyed it there, honestly, and I truly liked the staff. I also felt safe... If anything happened to me, I'd have support a button push away. I did feel quite well, however, so I decided to leave. I spent the morning packing up my things and saying goodbye to everyone. It was sad, even though I knew I'd be back the next day to visit my neighbor.

I had to make sure I had the supplies I needed for the catheter. That's another problem with leaving -- I lose access to the medical supplies. I got a bag for the catheter and a bunch of pads (dilating can be bloody, so can sleeping and sitting....). I spoke with Dr. Meltzer about removing my catheter and he said he'd stop by my hotel on Monday to remove it. Either he or one of his nurses would be within half an hour of me for several hours after that to ensure that it didn't need to be reinserted should I again fail to pee. I'm pretty sure my swelling will have gone down enough by then (hopefully!).

Robin came by and drove my mom and me to our hotel. After about three minutes there we knew it wouldn't work. Our hotel was just one single room with no living area. Two beds, two high chairs and a high table with the kitchen along the far wall. The chairs would not be at all comfortable for me -- not even with my inflatable donut ring -- so I saw myself spending nearly a full week in bed. It might have been ok were it my hospital bed that was very adjustable, but the cheap hotel bed wouldn't cut it. It also offered no privacy to dilate (has to be done in bed) or for my sister to study. We checked out another nearby suite-style hotel and took a walk to look at the rooms. It cost a bit more, but was so much better we knew we had to move. Thankfully my father covered the difference in cost (Thanks Dad!) and we moved that day. This new room has a separate living area with a couch and a TV in both rooms. It doesn't sound like much, but the couch gives me a much more pleasant alternative to being confined to bed and the TV in the bedroom allows me to distract myself while I dilate in privacy. Other amenities include a workout room (for my sister), free continental breakfast every day, free wireless internet and free wine at the bar during happy hour. It's also a much nicer place -- the old place had more of a road-side budget motel feel to it. Nothing was very nice and the beds weren't very comfortable. The rooms were only cleaned once a week (and even then not very well). This new place has a standard nation-wide hotel chain feel to it. Not luxurious, but certainly a step up from where we were before. It was the best move we could've made -- and I plan to stay here with my other sister when I return for my labiaplasty in March.